Live blogging the survivor premier....
Okay, this is, what... season 437 of Survivor? What are these people doing showing up for any part of the survivor experience...even the parts they think are pre-game...wearing clothing more suitable for a night on the town than a slog through the rainforest?? Come ON people...get a clue! Some of the women spent their first day in high heels, for crying out loud. Geeze Louise, you'd think by now people would know they shouldn't even show up for their audition tape dressed inappropriately. Sheesh.
First thing they have to do is go through a Buddist welcome ceremony. Some skinny blonde stick bitch is dissing everyone and everything. She's all "I'm from the city, we're not like that there." She rolls her eyes at the monk who's trying to get her to hold her hands properly for the ceremony. I hope she goes home first.
And we have a Jesus-Lady people! This should be fun. Right off the bat, she refuses to participate in the Buddist welcome ceremony because she has to bow down.
Chicken farmer from Virginia tries to help out by giving them his expertise but when they don't fall in line with what he's suggesting right away, he figures he'll back off and says "I'm just along for the ride." Well, they can really use someone like that around - he knows how to live in the woods - so either they better smarten up, or he better, cuz they're not going to keep him around long with an "along for the ride" attitude.
The female wrestler is the first to fall sick. Pukes on some shoes lying in the dirt. Real smart. Surfer Dude comes along and tells her to absolutely not think that her getting sick will make her a target to be voted off the island. Seconds later in tree diary he says "she's weak, she's going home first."
Lucky for the high-heeled ladies, the producers gave them sneakers for the first challenge, or they'd be screwed. Even so, most of them showed up for the challenge in their bras and skivvies. Fey Long wins the first challenge, a kind of obstacle course which they have to carry a chinese dragon. With this win, they get immunity and the all important fire-maker, flint.
The default leader of Zhan Hu tribe, who lost the challenge, is a surfing instructor who seems to think the sensitive empathetic route will work for him, holds the Chinese girl after they lose the challenge because she's all crying and upset. Later on Chinese girl takes over building their shelter because Chicken still won't give an opinion.
Lots of little naughty bits being blurred out already courtesy of the shorts and bras everyone's wearing.
Tribal council discussion centres around who did the least amount of work and who wants to step up and be a leader. And Chicken Man gets the boot. Are they ever going to regret that. The only person who knows how to survive in the wilderness. Nice move folks. But I pegged it, didn't I? I'm not usually that good at guessing Survivor.
Well, I don't see anything particularly interesting so far. They voted out the only interesting character they had on the show and there were no "twists" at all. I suspect this will be another season of Survivor that I won't bother with.
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